Of Scammers and real owners

Whozza! 

Holla Holla.. 

I trust you’re doing well.. If so, Doxology 😂. 

Today’s title is a real life story. My friend told me to go ahead to publish it. 

 DISCLAIMER!

I was laughing when he gave me the gist but now, I’ve lost steam so, don’t blame me if you don’t find it as funny as I did.
How many of you think because you live in Lagos (or Nigeria sef), you can’t get Scammed?  Ameannnnn.. Nigeria has practically ‘torn’ people’s eyes so, how can’t you be immune to scams? 

So, my friend, call him Bobo, got a scholarship for his MSc in January(BTW, I couldn’t contain my joy for him) in the US so, off to America he went. 

You know the general thought that once your friend is outside Nigeria and receiving excessive cold into his body, he’s made for life and he automatically has tarty-million for the akant? I think that was what bobo’s friends thought. Plus, we already have a friend in the ‘abroad’ so, let us start buying from Amazon ;our friend will bring it or find a way of sending it to Naija for us. That’s the only part I like sha. 

Bobo’s friend, call him  Ade, tells Bobo that he saw an iPhone on a US online store and would like him to help buy it then send to Naija. The deal was obviously very good. $275 for an iPhone plus it’s from Amerika. 

Bobo rings up the phone seller,they negotiate and reach an agreement for Bobo to wire half of the money and after the guy sends the phone via post, the 50% balance would be transferred to the seller. Sounds fair enough By the way, it’s quite a distance between the seller and Bobo. 

Some 30-40 minutes later, Bobo gets a picture of the seller sending the picture of the phone at the post office and he thought 💭 deal was done so he did what?  He transferred the 50% balance to the seller. Good boy! 

1 hour later… No phone. Well, it could be the ‘traffic’. You know there could be ‘hold up’ in oyinbo land too.

2 hours later, Phone is yet to appear. It’s like the guy sent the phone to a wrong mail box ‘ so Bobo in the infinite wisdom given to him by God, decides to call Mr seller. Guess what? 

Just guess naw.. 
 Scammer Seller had blocked bobo’s number. He dialed it a second time..same thing. That was when he knew he had been scammed. 

Hehehe.  What a way to say welcome to America! This happened in his first month of arrival. 

Did I remember to tell you Bobo was trying to be a good friend by helping Ade buy the phone with his money for him to be later refunded? Apparently, his money which he used was not really his.. It was someone else’s money 💵. Talk about double double. 😂. 

That was a wrong emoticon. It should have been 😐 😐 

If I was the one something like that happened to , I would go to the rest room to purge.. My stomach would get upset for no reason before the tears start flowing. Because in my mind, I’ll be like

• First of, GOD!  WHY DID YOU ABANDON ME?
• So……., the person whose money I used to buy Ade’s phone, he’s not the real owner? Because, the real owner just came to collect his money. You get? 
• How could I be scammed?  Me? A whole Lagos girl. Most Lagosians are naturally paranoid. Before a Lagos girl does something, she’d have thought of a thousand what-ifs before settling for the positives.
• Then I’ll settle for the real tears. Forgerrit, it’s definitely going to fill a bucket then I’ll probably sleep off, then wake up the following morning to confirm if what happened the night before was for real. 
• Then I would probably console myself and say something like ‘the scammer has kukuma taken all my sorrows away’. There’s always two ways of seeing things. Talmbout angu!

Then life as I know it will continue. After all, t’ésin bá dani, a máa túuň gùn ni. I don’t know how to translate it. Sorry ma/sah.

Have you ever been scammed in a strange land or new place before?  I would love to hear from you. 

You know the drill, drop a comment. 

Xoxo.