June has come.. Ended too. Most times, at the end of each year, I look back and it seems like I’ve done nothing all year. I probably get too overwhelmed trying to recall what I’ve done. And I know why. It’s usually because I (people) don’t seem to know what I’ve done with my life if I’ve not reached some crazy landmarks -finish my exams, traveled many countries,achieved some land breaking feats, resigned from my job to start my business, etcetera. But hey, it’s fine.. Little drops of water make an ocean. So, I’ll be doing a monthly review of my year. Basically, how I coped this year.
P.S This review started in January so, some stuffs might have been reversed before the end of the year.
P.S.S this is quite lengthy.
- 1st of January- For the first time in my life, I started the year on a bad,bleak and lonely note. I made a big decision prior to the 1st which was actually a big deal to me because I thought this was everything I had prayed for but well, life isn’t always perfect right?? Right??? You take some Ls sometimes.
And even though I was lodged in one of the costliest hotels in Abuja, it felt so sad,cold and everything in-between. I called my friend-call him B (he used to be the closest friend I had at some point) to give him a breakdown of what was going on with me -until talks between us took another interesting turn and I was like.. Okay, 2017 can do whatever it likes.
So, since I started the year on a bad note, I didn’t do any resolution radarada. I just wanted to be done with the year already. Lol.
- 3rd of January -Kabir traveled to the US for his MSc. I might not be lucky in so many things in this life but I’m darn lucky with my inner circle(friends) . There was a point where Kabir was the only one(read Ebun too)holding down the circle. His departure left me with a mixed feeling sort of – I was very happy he had a chance to chase his dreams. Boy never gives up but I also knew I’d really miss him. Like really really really. That US has stolen too many people from me abeg. He proved me wrong though because even with the annoying time zone/difference, he was still one phone call /whatsapp message/imo away. He was annoying sometimes too. Many times actually. Plus he knows how to leave me alone when I’m not in a good mood. I’m just happy my friends are successful and living their dreams.
28th- I went for this Irinajo trip to tarkwa bay. That was the beginning of my Waka about this year and boy did I love it! I met four people during the trip -two guys among them who eventually became my good friends.
Overall, it was a month I cried the most. It was just bleak for me kind of. Tears well up my eyes so quickly these days. But I wasn’t ready to let that make me bitter so,we move. I eventually came up with a resolution /to do list for the year.
For some days in the month, I woke up like I was going to take over the world which I did. For other days, I woke up feeling tired and annoyed. My mood swings on me like that. For no reason. I used to think something was wrong with me until I spoke to someone about it and told me it was completely normal. On such days, I just pray in tongues(it works guys!) and download a new album of an unknown artist. Works for me sha. All the time. Plus, I feel I have this trademark of God over me. One that says -‘Girl, you’re mine. I’m never letting you go.’ I felt this way a lot in February and God did come through.
I went on a getaway trip with a friend. Lollllll. Even I shock myself sometimes. He had been asking me for a time out since January so one day, I woke up and said -why not? It was by a beach side. Really beautiful. I didn’t regret it one bit.
Work became really crazy at some point too. Like back to back engagements. I almost broke into two. Lol. I couldn’t wait for the month to be over plus the next was my birthday month. Whoop whoop!
Birthday month! 😂 😂 😂 I thought of what to do for my birthday this year and it was so hard making a choice. I had an option to either do a nice spa, photo shoot, travel to Dubai( a friend-who is French by the way,promised to cover most of my expenses) or do a photo shoot. I would have loved to go to Dubai o.. Just for a minute atleast but my head just kept spinning. What if I was kidnapped? What if…. Have I mentioned how these what I ifs eventually rape me to making some funny decisions? Smh
I eventually settled for a photoshoot. Make up by my home girl -Tobi. She glammed me up that I couldn’t even recognize myself
I get a bit sober when it’s my birthday month. I really don’t know why. I went to shaunz bar with the girls(Jasmine and Jumoke) a day after my birthday but it didn’t really go as planned, though we had some fun. The used-to-be best friend of January- B also called me. It was a surprise kind of because I thought our friendship was done. But some friendships never die. I’m not exactly sure what ship it is even. Tbh, he made my day. Plus, he still has a way of making me blush 😂. But some things are better left unsaid.
22nd – Jasmine’s birthday. We went to celebrate her at Slay lounge. Did karaoke too. We literally counted down to her birthday-Mad fun. I got home past midnight and I raced to my house immediately the uber guy dropped me off. I love that girl and I can’t say why. She’s one of the few colleagues I can open up to,without shame and with all honesty.
22nd– My baby girl Christy bagged her PhD. Lol. You’d have thought I was the owner of the degree. I was too happy mehn. I’m just so grateful my friends are successful in their areas. Trust me, if you’re the only successful one among your friends, it’d be so difficult for you to enjoy life. Well..except you change your friends sha. There’s one more person’s PhD I’m waiting out for. 😉
I started to house hunt. It’s a scary thing for a typical Lagosian. Just pray you find a house comfortable enough for you to live until you build your own house. Where I stay isn’t bad but the area is rough and even my dad won’t come for a visit until I moved. Lol.
I eventually found one. Did I also mention that I’ve got the best parents(even though we quarrel steadily) that come through for me all the time!
I went to lekki Conservation center with Joan(the French guy). You should visit too. Lovely experience. You can read about my experience here.
Exam month. I’m tired of these exams, God knows even though my restless self won’t stop here.
I finally submitted my application for Stanford’s MBA fellowship program after procrastinating my essay and resume to forever. I had already submitted when I saw the fellowship was for people who are not financially stable. Lol. I was too sincere in my application but if I had seen that clause earlier, I wouldn’t have applied at all in the first instance.
Did I mention that this month is the brokest I’ve ever been? I experienced brokelyn even though I’m still in Lagos. I’m too ashamed to even ask my folks for anything. Lol. Please, let me suffer in silence this time.
Remember my home girl -Tobi? She came through for me today. She was my bunkmate in predegree and we were like cat and dog. She came back into my life at the right time I needed her. 😘 😘.
Sometime during the course of the month
Someone told me I was forming and act like I’m an innocent human. Lol. By the way, that’s like the second person telling me that within the space of 6 months. Lol. I’m not an angel. I’m as human as human can be and I’ve made some stupid wrong choices I’m not proud of-well, in my life’s context and that I wouldn’t want to share with anyone. Feel free to assume the bad choices 😂. However, I would never be caught dead doing some things. So, that settles that.
Other days of the month
I almost lost my faith this month. I got tired of praying and asking God for some mountains to be moved. I lost at the final stages of two projects I’ve been working on for about a year now. At some point, when I attempted to pray, I didn’t even know what to ask for. Like –God, refer to all my past supplication. I still believe I’m God’s favorite because at any point I want to let go, He just shows up.
I also believe He makes everything beautiful at His own time. I’m grateful for life and my parents -I can never take them for granted. I have learnt that it’s okay not to achieve your dreams when you expect and not to beat yourself up about it. Just take life one step at a time.
I hope the remaining half of this year come with all the answers to all the questions/prayers raised in the half year. One, full of laughter, joy, hope, love and forever goodness.
Happy new month everyone.